Hibernation

The season is drawing to a close. The Tour du Quebec has started with me not in it. Its amazing what happens when you dont check your emails for 2 days.

I came to PEI to let my mind relaxe. The unwind. To drink some beers and have some late nights with too much fun. So much fun that the bike must be forgotten the following day.

I'm finding lots of fun, and lots of good times here on the Red Dirt, but racing it seems is something that takes a little longer to dillute out of the blood. Constantly my mind is in racing mode. I find I cant go on 'rides' as they turn into 'training rides'. Training rides that dont lead to anything. I'm constantly on edge, keeping my sences keen and reflexes fast. I might not have the speed in the legs as a result of not racing lately, but I know it will come back fast.

Not only in cycling has this tenseness developed at the end of the year. I cant help but attack parts of my life. Even in casual conversation and mild daily goals I feel I must attack them without hessitation. I learned in a race, if you see the break go and you have the hole you must not hessitate to put the pedal down. No second thought or its gone. You cannot sit idly by and watch your destiny pass you.

This assertivness is what is driving my life. Whenever I have a slight urge to do something I feel I have to drop what I am doing and do it. I know if I procrastinate then the desire will leave and my task will not get done. I think I'm turning into a robot.